(Bunny Fiction) Mr. Mick and The Hangover, Part 2

Note from Jade: To read Part 1, you can scroll down one post or just click here. Again, many thanks to Lorna for the inspiration. :D

“Mick! Mick! Calm down, old pal! There has to be an explanation for this…”

Speedy put a paw out to keep the fuming lop from coming closer, then suddenly twitched his ears violently.  “Ghaaaaa! Stop that, Freddie!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” a tiny voice appeared to come from the inside of Speedy’s right ear. “I just don’t want to get bopped on the head, that’s all!”

Speedy thumped a hind foot. “Being bopped is the least of your worries if I accidentally shake you out—I won’t let him hurt you, just come out of there!”

Cautiously, the tiny gerbil came into view, clutching at Speedy’s ear and looking wide-eyed at Mick. “I swear, I swear, I didn’t do anything!”

“I didn’t say you did, you ninny, but something happened last night and I want to know what it was!” Mick looked at Speedy. “I was fine until I got to your party last night, then the next thing I know, I’m home with a splitting headache and I smell like I was used as a gerbil bed!”

He pointed up  with a paw at Freddie. “And I swear, if you peed on me, I will feed you to the nearest alley cat—“

“I didn’t! I didn’t!” Freddie squealed. “YOU were the one hugging me!”

“Whaddaya mean, ‘hugging you’?” Mick shook his head in disgust. “I don’t go around hugging foo’ gerbils, least of all you!”

Speedy spoke up. “I’m afraid you did, old chap. In fact, you were also offering ‘pony rides’ at the top of your lungs. As I recall, you did the Bunny 500 with Freddie here on your back at least three times. ”

Now it was Mick’s turn to go all wide-eyed. “What?! Impossible! Inconceivable!”

“You did! You did!” Freddie raced down Speedy’s leg and stood in front of Mick. “You were hugging us both and saying how much you loved us and how wunnerful we all were.”

He looked at Speedy. “Is ‘wunnerful’ even a word?”

Speedy nodded. “It is, but not like that, I think. “ He looked at Mick. “You did seem to be a few sheets into the wind, Mick. How many carrotinis did you have last night?”

Mick paused and thought. “Not all that many, I knew I had some more closet-hopping to do.”

“Are you sure? Perhaps you lost count—“

“No way, I’m always careful about that!”

“Perhaps you didn’t eat enough to balance things out, then?”

“Are you kidding?” Freddie interjected. “Since when does he not eat?!” He scampered behind Speedy as Mick glared at him. “Well, it’s true!”

Mick carefully groomed an ear and thought some more. “Of course I ate—not that much *glaring at Freddie*—but I did eat. Let’s see, there were the shredded carrots…and the banana slices…and that lovely kale--where did your Mum get that kale, I need to get some more of that?”

“I’ll ask her. Anything else?”

“Hmmm…there was the salad…and the blueberries…oh, and those marvelous hay cookies—even better than the ones my Mum makes!”

Speedy looked puzzled. “What hay cookies? I didn’t see any, and I know Mum didn’t make any.”

“Greedy bun! I only got one!” Freddie squeaked. He looked up at Speedy. “The ones in the pretty blue box—you didn’t see them?”

“No, I didn’t.” Speedy scratched his ear and thought a moment. “Don’t recall anyone bringing a box of hay cookies, either.  A shame, I would have loved to have a nibble, but I was busy being a proper host and all. ”

“Well, it’s not like anyone had a chance to eat them once Greedy McGreedypants here got at them!”

Freddie raced back up to perch between Speedy’s ears again as Mick took a swipe at him. “I grabbed one when he wasn’t looking, or he would have got them all!”

“I did not eat them all!” Mick paused, and for once, had the grace to look a bit embarrassed. “Well, I did lose track of how many I had…they were just so very yummy. I wish I knew who brought them.”

“Hmmm…perhaps the box is still around. I had to clean up very quickly before the humans woke up.”

Speedy turned and headed towards the kitchen, Freddie clinging to one ear. “Come on, let’s have a look through the trash.”

The three went into the kitchen, where a well-loaded trash bin sat. Mick periscoped up on his hind legs to try to get a glimpse into it. “Gawd, it stinks! What have your humans been eating?”

“I have no idea. I think we’re going to need to knock it down so we can go through it.”

“Do we have to?” Mick sat down and grumbled. “I just got the smell of gerbil off me—I don’t want to be smelling like yesterday’s dinner now.”

“Do you want to find out what happened or don’t you? Freddie, you’d better hop off and move back. Go keep an eye out for Mum and Dad for us. ”

Freddie hopped down and scampered off. The two rabbits moved to one side of the wastebasket, and periscoping up and leaning against it, managed to slowly tip it over. Garbage spilled out across the floor, and Speedy immediately hopped over and began pawing through it. Mick less-than-enthusiastically waved a paw delicately over bits and pieces, carefully pushing things aside. Speedy gave him a scornful look. “Oh, come on—it’s not that bad.”

“Yes, it is. You may not mind being stinky, but I—wait, wait! There it is!” Mick pointed at a bright blue metal box corner sticking up out of a pile of damp paper.

Speedy dug it out, grabbed it with his teeth and pulled it to one side. The box had no lid; inside it was a bit of wax paper sprinkled with crumbs. He sniffed at it, and recoiled with a sneeze. “Wooo! Are you sure there were cookies in there? That box smells rummy!”

Freddie scampered over to the box. “Yes! Yes! That’s it—ooh, crumbs!” He hopped into the box and started licking the waxed paper eagerly.

Mick shook his head in disgust. “Foo’ gerbil—don’t you know better than to eat something that’s been in the garbage?”

Freddie ignored him and kept licking at the paper until every crumb was gone. “You’re just jealous that I got the last of it.” He hopped out of the box and began cleaning his whiskers to get every last bit.

Speedy inspected the box. “I don’t see any markings on it, and that awful smell is hiding any scents so I don’t know who brought it, but it certainly stinks like rum. You didn’t smell that when you were eating them?”

Mick shook his head. “Nope, but then again my nose isn’t as good when I’ve been sipping carrotinis.”

“Your nose isn’t all that good even when you haven’t!” squeaked Freddie. He stuck his tongue out at Mick, then bounced in and out between Speedy’s paws as Mick’s eyes narrowed at him. “Nyah, nyah, nyah—try to catch me, ya fat puffball!”

Speedy looked down in amusement at Freddie. “I say, you’ve gotten rather bold all of a sudden. Are you alright?”

“Never better! Come on, fat boy, what are ya waitin’ for?!” Freddie danced back-and-forth, back-and-forth, his tail whipping about as he inched closer and closer to Mick’s fluffy front paws, darting in to tag them lightly every so often, then dropping back to dance some more. 

Mick looked down at the bouncing gerbil, then at Speedy, then down at Freddie again. With one quick paw swipe, he launched Freddie up into the air. As the gerbil came down, Mick swatted him again, sending Freddie into the now-half-empty trash bin. He looked at Speedy. “You have to admit, he asked for it.”

“Well, yes, but you didn’t have to give it to him.”

“He’ll be fine, it’s soft garbage in there.” Mick pointed with a paw. “See, he found the banana peels. He’s fine.”

Speedy sighed. “Yes, but we’re going to have to dig him out and send him home to Lorna, y’know.”

“Crap, forgot about that.” Mick hopped over to the edge of the bin and carefully peeked his head in. “Get yourself out here, foo’ gerbil, and I hope you learned your lesson.”

There was nothing but silence in response. Speedy’s brow furrowed. He called out, “Freddie, are you okay?”

Suddenly the faint sound of snoring came from the trash bin. Speedy shook his head. “Those must have been some powerful cookies if the crumbs could do that to him. Come to think of it, he was a little wilder than usual last night as well…”

“Foo’ gerbil just can’t hold his rum, that’s all.”

Speedy gave his friend a look. “And you could…?”

Mick snorted. “I had far more of those cookies than he did; of course they had more of an impact." A look of horror suddenly crossed his face. "How many rabbits did you say were here?"

"About a half-dozen, but you're lucky; they all left after you started hugging them, they didn't get the entire show. Nothing for you to worry about."

Mick shook his head and pretended to look unconcerned. “ Not worried, who said I was worried? Anyway, it looks like no harm was done—“

“—other than to somebunny’s pride—“ Speedy mumbled under his breath with a chuckle.

Mick ignored him. “—and since there’s nothing to tell us who left it, I guess we’re done here.”

"Fine." Speedy reached his head into the garbage bin, carefully pulled out the still-snoozing Freddie by the scruff with his teeth and set him down next to Mick. “You’ll have to see him home while I clean this up. It's the least you could do, after all.”

Mick sighed. “Oh, fine, but just this once...”

He carefully picked up the gerbil, nose twitching at the smell, and mumbled (with his mouth full of gerbil scruff):

“ ‘Sa goo fing he smell like ‘nanas now…”

…

“Did I get the pictures you wanted?”

The Boy nodded as he scrolled through the images on his camera; Mick hugging Speedy, Mick hopping headfirst into a closet door, Mick sitting in a salad bowl with a large lettuce leaf on his head, Mick running around the room with Freddie on his back, Mick hugging Freddie.

“Yes, they’re perfect. Thanks for your help—I couldn’t have pulled this off without you. You’re sure none of them saw you?”

“I’m sure. I have my ways of staying out of sight, even from rabbits.”

“How much do I owe you?”

The Doctor grinned. “Oh, please, it was my pleasure—after what that orange furball did to my TARDIS after the last time we met, it was the least I could do.”

He gestured toward the camera.  “So what do you plan on doing with those?”

The Boy grinned wickedly. “Let’s just say that somebunny is going to have a big surprise the next time he checks out his Bunspace page.”

The Doctor chuckled. “Well-played, young man.”

The End…?

(Bunny Fiction) Mr. Mick and The Hangover, Part 1

Note from Jade: A Happy Hoppy New Year to everyone and everybun! The following is inspired by our friend Lorna's tales of Mick's misadventures--and a FB convo with her Viking friend Kim along those lines...

Mr. Mick slowly woke and shook his head, then winced in pain. His mum had spoken of “headaches” before, but he had never experienced one until just now. It was as unpleasant as she had described; every movement was like somebunny was thumping on his brain--even his ears ached from base to tip. He carefully got to his feet and looked around; his cage was in its usual state of disarray, there were some leftover pellets in his dish and a few strands of hay in his water bowl—nothing that would indicate anything out of the ordinary. He sniffed the air, then wrinkled his nose and sneezed. What was that smell?! He sniffed again…if his head wasn’t hurting so much, he thought, he’d know it by now…was that a hint of—sunflower seed?! Mick's eyes went wide, and he practically squeaked in indignation.

“Why does my fur smell like foo’ gerbil?!”

“I have no idea.” said his Mum. “Did you go getting yourself up to no good after I went to bed?”

“Noooo…” Mick replied slowly (partly because he just might have been—he wasn’t quite sure—but mainly because it hurt too much to talk). He nibbled at the New Year’s treat oats Mum offered by hand to him, thinking perhaps a full belly would clear his head. Despite the pounding of his bunny skull, he tried to remember the events of the night before. He had gone out closet-hopping after Mum had gone to bed, that much he remembered. He had gone to Auntie Shell’s first to visit Harrington and Hannah, then made quick stops to see the Lavender Rabbits and the OK Corral  on his way to the West Coast to say hi to the Houseful of Rabbits, Mario and Clovie and have a cup of herbal tea with the 4Buns + 1 at the Bun Zen Center…then it was across the big water to wish Wesley and Buttons a Hoppy New Year before he made his way to Speedy’s…and that's where it becomes a little fuzzy, he thought . He knew he had planned to go see Lorna, his furry bunmother, perhaps sneak some cuddles and a few blueberries, and have a word with Freddie the foo' gerbil about "things not to say to Mick's Mum if he didn't want Mick to play 'Little Bunny Foo Foo' with him" before going home. From the smell of things, he had obviously gotten there, but he had no idea what had happened while he was there…nor had any clue how it was that he came to reek of gerbil. 

Mick’s nose wrinkled, and he sneezed and shuddered again. He gave himself a long wash, then rolled in his hay pile until he felt somewhat more himself. Mum had cleaned and filled his bowls, so he had some lunch—and a LOT of water—then laid down for a nap. When his head felt better, he would get to the bottom of this…and somebunny (or gerbil) was going to pay…

To Be Continued...

You better watch out...

...Santa Mick is comin' to town. 

(and cryin' and poutin' are nothin' compared to what you'll do

 if there's no hay cookies waiting for him under your tree)

Thanks ever so much to everyone and everybun for the birthday wishes--they were so very much appreciated. I had a lovely 50th birthday...at least until the end of the night, when it turned out that hubby had one last gift for me: his cold. Fortunately, I only had one week of misery, while hubby had almost three. We're both fine now except for the occasional coughing bout, but it did put me even further behind in my projects than before (after all, the last thing I need to do is include a dose of the plague in with my cards and blankets).

I was planning to do a humongous calendar giveaway for Christmas this year similar to what I did last year, because Mr. Mick is not only appearing twice in the Bunspace calendar for 2013, but he is also in the House Rabbit Connection calendar for 2013. All I can say is that there is a slight change in plans, but I will say that if you would like one of Mick's holiday cards (and I don't already have your mailing address), please email me at jade@jademyst.com and let me know ASAP. First come, first served and all that. 

As for His Majesty, he has been trying (and failing) to stay off of Santa Paws' naughty list as usual. He gave himself quite the scare last night while attempting to help himself to his container of hay cookies on my computer desk. I was sitting at the computer typing up an invoice, while Mick was perched on his footstool next to my chair. Suddenly, there was a scrambling, wriggling ball of orange fur half in my lap and half on my keyboard! Mick had jumped up from the footstool and semi-landed in my lap somehow (quite a feat for a middle-aged bun of excessive...fluff) and was simultaneously freaking out over his accidental accomplishment and trying to escape back to his footstool, while I was trying to scoop him up and get him secured against my chest so he would neither fall to the ground nor accidentally hurt himself with all his flinging himself around. Finally, I got him against my shoulder (thank gawd my chair had a high back, I think he would have leaped off my shoulder in his panic) and got him calmed down. He was wide-eyed and breathing hard, but otherwise fine, so I began stroking his nose and giving him a massage until he was settled down and toothpurring. Once I was sure he was calm again, I gave him a cookie and set him back down again and he went bopping off as if nothing had happened, but I'm sure he's not going to try that stunt again. Foo' wabbit. 

I call this "Out of Hay Cookies". 

I must sign off now--if by some chance I do not get around to posting again before the 25th, I want to wish everyone and everybun a joyous holiday season: Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy Festivus, and Happy Holidays from me and Mr. Mick!

Wanted: Publicist

...because this one's just not doing her job.

Hey all, Mickey here.

Honestly, for a human who spends so much time on the computer, you'd think Mum would be able to take a few minutes to update this thing--but no, I'm stuck having to sit here and type it all myself. Mum's new touchscreen computer doesn't make it any easier, either--do you know how hard it is to slap a screen and hit the right letter when you have fuzzy bunny paws?

It has been one rough couple of weeks, let me tell you. First off, I had to put up with The Boy being home last week. Fortunately, he wasn't as much trouble as he usually is; Mum kept him too busy installing the new computer for him to bother me, and he did manage to pet me a few times, but he's still a pain in the butt. I tried to help him with the computer (since he's a foo' human and doesn't know about these things), but he just kept shooing me away. I should have pooped in his shoes, but he hid them on me. Good thing he didn't stay very long. Mum says he's going to be back next month for something called "winter break", though, and that he'll be around a while longer. I'm going to have to make some plans...

There were a bunch of Mum's family here for that Thanksgiving thing you humans do--not that they paid much attention to me, they were way too busy eating and making noise. Mum did give me a nice fat baby carrot as a holiday treat, though. I would have liked to have more, but she said I couldn't because of my digestion issues. I said the only digestion issue I have is not getting more good stuff to digest.

To top all this off, Mum went and rearranged my lounge area. She said she had to clear the dining room out because of the company coming (she insists on calling it "the dining room" for some reason), but that is no excuse for moving my stuff around! She's even rearranged my footstools under the computer desk so I can only use one of them, and insists on using the other one herself! The nerve. I thumped at her repeatedly, but she refused to listen. Honestly, you just can't find good slaves these days.

I will credit Mum for one thing, though; she does make sure to keep plenty of hay cookies in stock for me. She made a batch late the other night so I would have something to nibble on. She even lets me lick the spoon once she's made them:




Tomorrow is her birthday, so I have graciously allowed her the day off to go shopping and buy herself some nice things (as long as she makes it back home in time to feed me, that is). I figure if I do something nice for her, she'll have to do something nice for me, like maybe give me another baby carrot or something.

Speaking of gifts, I got a really nice Christmas card from my pal Speedy and his mum. Thanks, guys! Mum will be sending out my Christmas cards soon, too--along with a few gifts as well...

Ok, my paws are getting tired and I am way overdue for my pre-lunch nap. Hopefully Mum will see this and get the hint, so you'll see some more posts soon. Later!

Picking up the slack...

Hey all, Mickey here.

Time for me to save Mum's slacker butt again--honestly, is it all that hard to keep people informed as to what I'm doing? I swear, if it wasn't for the fact that she's been helping other rabbits find homes, I'd find myself a new slave in a heartbeat. 

Let's see, what's been going on here? Well, a couple of weeks ago, Mum and The Big Guy left me with the Alternate Slave while they went to visit The Boy off at college. Of course, I had to put Alternate Slave through her paces right off the bat--I snuck into Mum's room when AS left the door open and hid where she couldn't find me. She was smart, though; she got out the oats and we negotiated a truce. After that, we were just fine.

Fortunately, Mum didn't bring The Boy home with her when she came back, although she says he'll be coming home in three weeks for the Thanksgiving weekend (and for this I'm supposed to be "giving thanks"? Feh, I'll poop in his travel bag.). 

Otherwise, it's been quiet...well, quiet for me, anyway. Mum's been running around like a bunneh doing the 500--always chasing her tail. I don't mind as long as she feeds me on time. 

While Mum's been distracted, I've been busy visiting my pal Speedy and having fun. You can read about some of our adventures on my furry godmother Lorna's blog. I miss having adventures with my old friend Weasley since he crossed the Bridge, but Speedy's a great pal and I know I'll see Weasley again someday. Knowing Weasley, he's already recruited Ginny, Hef, Bella and all the other Bridge buns for wild and crazy adventures. 

Speaking of Speedy, he was nice enough to nominate me for some Super Sweet Blogging Award--personally, I'm guessing it's some kind of prank, as there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING "super sweet" about me (I can hear you laughing, Mum--stop it!), but I will be a good sport and play the game. 

Let's see...I'm supposed to answer some questions first:

1: Cookies or cake? Mum says both. I say both, too--banana hay cookies and banana hay cupcakes.
2: Chocolate or Vanilla? Mum says chocolate, I say banana. 
3:Favourite sweet treat? Need you ask? Banana-flavored anything. 
4: When do you crave sweet things? When DON'T I crave sweet things?
5: If you had a sweet nickname, what would it be? I don't have a sweet nickname because I'M NOT SWEET, but Mum calls me Mr. Mick, Foo' Wabbit and His Majesty.

Now I'm supposed to nominate somebunny as well. Okay, here goes:

My furry godmother, Lorna, at Fuzzy Creatures

My beloved Auntie Shell (and cousins Harrington and Hannah) at The Raspberry Rabbits

The Lavender Rabbits (and their mum) at Lavender Rabbit Hoppenings

4Buns +1 (and their mum) at The Qi Papers

Weasley's mum at Rabbits Eat Quilts

and Wesley and his mum and all the hares at The Leveret's Nest 

Again, I am NOT a "super sweet" bun--I am a cunning and wily rabbit who only pretends to be cute and cuddly so he can achieve his goal of world domination!

Honestly, does this look like a "super sweet" rabbit to you?!

Oops, wait--wrong picture. How about this one?

Dangit, not that one, either...

*sigh* Never mind, just take my word for it--okay?

Oh, one last thing; there's supposed to be a stupid hurricane headed this way. Mum has made sure that I have plenty of food, hay and water just in case, so don't worry about me. She made sure that The Boy is going to be safe and sound at school, too (he's going to get the storm before we do, so I suppose there's some comfort in that). Mum and I will be thinking good thoughts for my fellow rabbits and their humans who will be dealing with this as well. Hopefully, everyone and everybun will get through this safe and sound.

Words to live by, people. See you later!

Still Here...

Putting up a quick post so I can say I posted in September...

Mr. Mick and I are both doing well, although Mick has had some issues with one of his eyes, so I've spent the week putting eye ointment in both eyes. He's been surprisingly good about this, although at this point we're both sick of it. Two more doses and we're done, though. There's just not enough time to write about the general craziness that's been my days lately--good crazy, but too crazy for me to find words for. The brain hasn't even been able to find the words to post comments to the bunny blogs of my friends; I have been lurking and enjoying (and "liking" on Facebook as much as I can), but words just haven't been able to find their way from brain to fingers.

Here's a clip of Mick that I posted to YouTube last night; somebunny managed to find his way into my computer chair in the short time that it took for me to make my way from the kitchen to the dining room/office. Getting down from the chair, however, was a different matter:




You can see the greasiness of the eye ointment around his eyes and on his cheeks. His Majesty does not approve of his diminished appearance whatsoever, so once we're done with his treatment, I have to figure out how to clean all that off of him.

Hubby and I will be going to visit the boy down in Maryland for Parents' Weekend in a couple of weeks. Even though we've been more or less in constant contact through text, email and phone, it'll be nice to actually see him in person. Hopefully, I'll have time to post again before then.

A Hare Raising Tail

Catching up seems to have become my normal mode here, I swear...

Three weeks ago, Mr. Mick and I received the bestest package of goodies from our friends Annette and Wesley of The Leveret's Nest (and if you have never visited Annette's blog or her Etsy store, you should. Now.) :


Note: Blogger is giving me fits about uploading pics, so I had to load them to my personal webspace. If they don't show, please let me know.




This is part of what was under all the lovely wrapping: I had ordered a baby hare ornament from Annette, and she snuck in a few extras!

This package contained some of Annette's homemade hay cookies for Mr. Mick (how Wesley let you part with any of those, Annette, I don't know)




This is the oh-so-*squee* baby hare ornament I ordered and the card that came with him. (To see a larger version of this pic and read the story, go here.)




This is Baby Hare Kinglet, who decided to come along for the ride. Like all of Annette's hares, she comes with her own personal "tail", which you can read by clicking here: Kinglet's "Tail"



Annette also sent an assortment of the lovely cards she makes (which will probably never get sent to anyone because I cannot bear to part with them).



On top of all this wonderfulness? A new throne for His Majesty, handmade by Annette! Of course, I had to let the baby hares have a chance to play in it before Mick got his paws on it, because he never shares.


"Hmmmmm, what do we have here? Soft? Check. Nice comfy sides for resting my head? Check. Oh, yes, this is quite nice..."



"Now why can't YOU make something like this? Hmph...and what's all this about homemade cookies?!"



"Om nom nom...oh, yummmmmm,,,make sure you get the recipe from Annette for these, Mum...better yet, just tell her to keep 'em coming...oh man, that Wesley is a lucky bun..."

 Seriously, he gobbled those cookies down in nanoseconds--he probably would have eaten them all in one sitting if I had let him. Thank you so much, Annette and Wesley! Mick and I are working on repaying the kindness, but it's taking some time. Hopefully it'll be worth the wait...